These three suggestions come straight from the Search Institute and are some simple ways that we can all be asset builders to young people in our lives.
1. Ask a young person what their opinion is on something. It can be in relation to an important global issue, a recent movie they have seen, or something more personal to their life. Adults and young people alike are more likely to engage in a conversation when someone is interested in what they have to say.
2. Ask them to help you. I know nothing makes me feel better than to know that someone needs my help, young people can gain that same self of empowerment and self confidence from being asked to help out with something. Anytime two or more people work together on a project is a great opportunity to make a meaninful connection!
3. Give them your undivided attention. This one is HUGE and not as easy at it sounds to pull off. Anytime a caring adult can sit down with a young person and give them their undivided attention it sends an important message: You Are Important To Me! In order for this one to be successful it requires, one on one time, no distractions (turn off the tv, radio in the car, and put down that phone!), and a good listening ear!
Enjoy your week and have fun supporting and encouraging the young people in your life!
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Thursday, December 2, 2010
December is HERE!
We are officially in the countdown to Christmas. Over the next few weeks many families will be enjoying (or enduring) Christmas Concerts, Christmas Parties, Christmas Cookie Exchanges and.... you get the idea. I know our family schedule is quickly filling up! School activities, family get togethers, and extracurricular events as well as work commitments make this probably the busiest time of the year.
My strategy this time of the year is to schedule in time to do absolutely NOTHING! Yes, that's right. I am blocking off afternoons and evenings to simply do NOTHING! How else are we going to have time to recharge, rest, and really enjoy this Christmas season? There are some commitments that we can do without. If you have the opportunity to "opt out" of one or two seasonal celebrations, I say GO FOR IT! Sit down, have a hot chocolate with your family, watch a classic Christmas movie, go outside for a wintery walk, wrap presents or make some cookies just for FUN!
Slow down this Christmas and take the time to ponder what it is about this time of year that is truly special for you and your family!
Enjoy the Holidays!
My strategy this time of the year is to schedule in time to do absolutely NOTHING! Yes, that's right. I am blocking off afternoons and evenings to simply do NOTHING! How else are we going to have time to recharge, rest, and really enjoy this Christmas season? There are some commitments that we can do without. If you have the opportunity to "opt out" of one or two seasonal celebrations, I say GO FOR IT! Sit down, have a hot chocolate with your family, watch a classic Christmas movie, go outside for a wintery walk, wrap presents or make some cookies just for FUN!
Slow down this Christmas and take the time to ponder what it is about this time of year that is truly special for you and your family!
Enjoy the Holidays!
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Nice November!
This unseasonably warm November weather has got me in a very good mood! We have a few more days of pleasant weather in which to go for walks, bike rides, barbecue, clean up our yards and even hang Christmas lights if we are really organized! How are you enjoying this stretch of great weather?
How was your Halloween? Our kids didn't even need to hide their cute (or creepy) costumes under a snow suit this year! I hope you enjoyed walking around your neighbourhoodd, talking to your neighbours and enjoying a fun (and spooky) holiday!
As we prepare for the next holiday season reember to make the most of sunny warm days, down time with your family and take the opportunity to connect with your community when the opportunity arises. If you are looking for an opportunity to give back to people within your community who might not be looking forward to the Christmas season, get in touch with Tina at Christmas Elves. In addition to donations of food, baby items and unwrapped Christmas gifts they are always looking for volunteers to make Christmas brighter and more joyful for those less fortunate, right here in Beaumont!
Take care and remember you ARE and ASSET BUILDER!
How was your Halloween? Our kids didn't even need to hide their cute (or creepy) costumes under a snow suit this year! I hope you enjoyed walking around your neighbourhoodd, talking to your neighbours and enjoying a fun (and spooky) holiday!
As we prepare for the next holiday season reember to make the most of sunny warm days, down time with your family and take the opportunity to connect with your community when the opportunity arises. If you are looking for an opportunity to give back to people within your community who might not be looking forward to the Christmas season, get in touch with Tina at Christmas Elves. In addition to donations of food, baby items and unwrapped Christmas gifts they are always looking for volunteers to make Christmas brighter and more joyful for those less fortunate, right here in Beaumont!
Take care and remember you ARE and ASSET BUILDER!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Building Assets in Our (and other) Kids!
Wow, hard to believe we are almost half way through October! I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving weekend! This seems to be perfect timing to talk about Asset #3...Relationships with other Adults.
When we are surrounded by friends and family during a holiday weekend like Thanksgiving, we are keenly aware of the importance of the relationships in our lives. Even if we are involved in a long term committed relationship, the majority of people have a much larger network of friends and support. The same need for more connection, support and relationships holds true for children.
As our children become older and develop interests along with their gifts and ablities, the time is going to come that we as parents are unequipped to be everything that our child needs. We see evidence of this when they have music teachers, coaches or instructors that have expertise more specialized than what we posess. Time spent with these kinds of people can offer more than strictly technical instruction. When young people have the chance to learn from, interact and be listened to by other caring adults in their lives they experience greater self esteem and connection to their community.
We don't have to look very far to see other options for these caring adults for our children to connect with. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, neighbours and family friends are other people that can offer a listening ear or advice to your child. The more people in your child's life that offers unconditional support and some special attention helps build your child into a confident and contributing member of our community.
We can also be that extra support person to other young people in our lives. Take the time to get to know your child's friends, volunteer to coach a sports team or mentor a young person in your community and be that caring adult for other kids in your neighbourhood.
Have a great week and keep helping kids develop, one asset at a time!
When we are surrounded by friends and family during a holiday weekend like Thanksgiving, we are keenly aware of the importance of the relationships in our lives. Even if we are involved in a long term committed relationship, the majority of people have a much larger network of friends and support. The same need for more connection, support and relationships holds true for children.
As our children become older and develop interests along with their gifts and ablities, the time is going to come that we as parents are unequipped to be everything that our child needs. We see evidence of this when they have music teachers, coaches or instructors that have expertise more specialized than what we posess. Time spent with these kinds of people can offer more than strictly technical instruction. When young people have the chance to learn from, interact and be listened to by other caring adults in their lives they experience greater self esteem and connection to their community.
We don't have to look very far to see other options for these caring adults for our children to connect with. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, neighbours and family friends are other people that can offer a listening ear or advice to your child. The more people in your child's life that offers unconditional support and some special attention helps build your child into a confident and contributing member of our community.
We can also be that extra support person to other young people in our lives. Take the time to get to know your child's friends, volunteer to coach a sports team or mentor a young person in your community and be that caring adult for other kids in your neighbourhood.
Have a great week and keep helping kids develop, one asset at a time!
Monday, September 27, 2010
Parents as Asset Builders...Positive Family Communication
There is much to be said about Positive Family Communication, this is such an important Developmental Asset. Here are some ideas I want to share with you.
1. Teach your children the language of emotion. Help them to describe how they are feeling, this will help them understand how they are feeling and communicate those feelings to you, their parent.
2. If your child is feeling angry, sad or really excited try to find out why. If they don't want to tell you why, make sure you know that you are there for them and will be ready to listen when they are ready to share. Sometimes pushing your child to share when they are not ready can do exactly the opposite of what you are trying to accomplish. Patience is key!
3. Remember eye contact. We all know how it feels when someone we are talking to seems distracted or not really listening. It is every bit as frustrating and minimizing when we do it to our children. Get down to their level, take the time to really listen and let them know you really care.
4. Careful with jokes and teasing. What might seem like harmless fun from our perspective might feel very different from the perspective of our youngster. Watch carefully for signs that jokes or teasing is making your child uncomfortable or hurting their feelings.
5. Let the emotions of your child come out without judgement or shame. Scolding a child for crying or being angry simply teaches them their feelings are not valid and they should keep them inside. It won't stop them from feeling that way, only prevents them from sharing them freely. Even if you feel the issue is trivial, let them express their sorrow without judgement or feelings of shame.
Of course this is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to Positive Family Communication. There have been hundres of books written on this very subject. These are some great starting points and ideas for places to start in creating an environment in your home, were communicationis honest and helpful. Have a great week and remember, everyone can be an asset builder!
1. Teach your children the language of emotion. Help them to describe how they are feeling, this will help them understand how they are feeling and communicate those feelings to you, their parent.
2. If your child is feeling angry, sad or really excited try to find out why. If they don't want to tell you why, make sure you know that you are there for them and will be ready to listen when they are ready to share. Sometimes pushing your child to share when they are not ready can do exactly the opposite of what you are trying to accomplish. Patience is key!
3. Remember eye contact. We all know how it feels when someone we are talking to seems distracted or not really listening. It is every bit as frustrating and minimizing when we do it to our children. Get down to their level, take the time to really listen and let them know you really care.
4. Careful with jokes and teasing. What might seem like harmless fun from our perspective might feel very different from the perspective of our youngster. Watch carefully for signs that jokes or teasing is making your child uncomfortable or hurting their feelings.
5. Let the emotions of your child come out without judgement or shame. Scolding a child for crying or being angry simply teaches them their feelings are not valid and they should keep them inside. It won't stop them from feeling that way, only prevents them from sharing them freely. Even if you feel the issue is trivial, let them express their sorrow without judgement or feelings of shame.
Of course this is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to Positive Family Communication. There have been hundres of books written on this very subject. These are some great starting points and ideas for places to start in creating an environment in your home, were communicationis honest and helpful. Have a great week and remember, everyone can be an asset builder!
Monday, September 20, 2010
Parents as Asset Builders....Building Assets in your child, one at a time
Most parents want their kids to succeed....the 40 Developmental Assets have been clearly shown to help kids do just that! Over the next several months I am going to be highlighing an asset or two here on the FCSS Blog. Describe what it is and how these specific assets can be developed in our kids. I'm starting out with the most obvious and straightforward, even though they might seem like commen sense to most parents I think they warrant highlighting. Here are all of the 40 Developmental Assets:
Lets start with #1 Family Support. For a young person to feel like they have family support means they have a safe home and family life. They feel like they are valued as a member of the family and would describe their family as a "safe place". Young people need to be around people that love, care for, appreciate, and accept them. The family unit regardless of what that looks like is the first and most important place a child should feel all of those things. We can all say we love our children...think about how your child knows that to be true. Think about how your child knows they are appreicated and accepted for who they are. Parents really set the tone for how these important components of family life are communicated and more importantly demonstrated. Telling your child you love them, listening to what they have to say about school, interests and life in general, and letting them know you appreciate all that they are and do are all great ways to build Family Support.
Remember, there are no "butts" in the 40 Developmental Assets! Be an Asset Builder Today!
Lets start with #1 Family Support. For a young person to feel like they have family support means they have a safe home and family life. They feel like they are valued as a member of the family and would describe their family as a "safe place". Young people need to be around people that love, care for, appreciate, and accept them. The family unit regardless of what that looks like is the first and most important place a child should feel all of those things. We can all say we love our children...think about how your child knows that to be true. Think about how your child knows they are appreicated and accepted for who they are. Parents really set the tone for how these important components of family life are communicated and more importantly demonstrated. Telling your child you love them, listening to what they have to say about school, interests and life in general, and letting them know you appreciate all that they are and do are all great ways to build Family Support.
Remember, there are no "butts" in the 40 Developmental Assets! Be an Asset Builder Today!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
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